That sounded more arrogant than I meant- which is simply, to add and balance this to my life as carefully as possible.

A long time ago there was this TV program, Amazing Stories. I think Steven Spielberg had something to do with it but I don't remember. Anyway, one story featured this sadistic teacher who would punish his students by stacking books in their hands, arms outstretched to the sides and hell to pay if they dropped them. I don't remember the end, only the teacher naming titles as he stacked them in each hand.

I feel like that student sometimes.